take.me.away

if you're sleeping, are you dreaming? if you're dreaming, are you dreaming of me?

2007-05-02T16:27:01Z

i really need to start writing in here more to vent out.

here's news:

mike and i are done.done. i have no energy to try and fix something that's beyond repair. but we're friends. and it's nice.

i'm dating kevin. kevin is incredible. he's the funniest person i've ever met in my entire life. he makes me really happy. we joke around so much, and i can be myself around him. no matter what i say to him, i know he'll be there for me. it's great.

i have a job i love. i love the people i work with. it's sweet.

i haven't seen a lot of my friends in a while (i.e. colchester). buttt i'm getting paid this week, so i'm definitely going to try and go down in the next two weeks. it'll be sickkk.

family is fine. on my mom's side anyway. i don't talk to my dad's side.

i graduated, and i'll be going to college in the fall. maybe a class in the summer. sweet.

forever and a half

2006-11-25T22:02:45Z

so wow it's been life since i've updated. mike and i are still together. it's been over a year now. i'd write everything that's happened but that would take way too long and i don't have the patience.

Greg and i are on reasonably better terms.
Mattie and i don't talk really. ever.
Chantal and i almost never see each other. and we rarely talk. except about how we don't see each other.
i don't really talk to anyone of my friends except Sara.
i'm still at avon high becuz i was retarded and didn't graduate.
i'm not applying to colleges. i gave up. i'm going to go to a community college next september.
i turn 18 in about 2 weeks.
i graduate in a month and a half. ish.
i want to move out, but i have nowhere to go. Mike doesn't want to live with me.
i don't have the money to get an apartment.
i work at Toys R Us for minimum fucking wage.
i live in bristol.
i don't have my own room. my room is the living room pretty much.
or as my parents put it... the 'rec room'.
the only people i really talk to are Mike, his friends, and my step brother.
i have a niece and nephew who i babysit frequently.
i student teach choir at avon middle school for my class at avon high.

that's my quick update. yippee.

fury of the storm

2006-02-28T00:41:57Z

i haven't really updated or anything lately. so here's a brief list of what's going on:

* i'm on better terms with Greg. which is good. i mean we're not all best friends or anything, but we can talk. which is good and i'm happy for that.

* i've realized who my real friends are. who will actually take the time to see me or attempt to hang out with me. which are all of like, what, 3 people? i talk to Nicole a lot more about our problems and stuff but she acts different in school than when we talk online. it's kind of weird. i've realized i lost a lot of my friends, but i gained a lot more. i see Mike like every day of my life, and stayed there all vacation. while he was in school i either hung out with Alex or Chris, which is awesome. i like the fact that i can hang out with Alex and it's not that like we only hang out cuz i'm dating his friend. i've also become a lot better friends with Chris which is awesome. the four of us had a blast this week. i wish we'd see Shaina more though. she's nice i like her.

* i've started to really miss college people. for reasons i dont know either. i miss Kevin with my life. like at coffee house i didn't want to sing because it was our thing. i miss tomford which i'm not sure why. he's completely awesome, we just never really talked. same with bartles. both of them were just like the kind of people that would talk to me, but only hang out to like, hook up i guess. idk. awkward.

* i've missed Chantal. she was like my best friend for months and just stopped. it's really ever since the car accident. idk. but for whatever reason we just stopped talking i guess. i've also missed Mattie for god knows what reason. he was just fun to talk to i guess. idk

* Mike and I basically decided we're getting married. like, we've planned it out haha. i love him more than i've ever loved anyone. it's ridiculous. idk how to explain it. i'm empty if we're not together. i could never imagine life without him, nor would i want to.

i should probably go finish homework *sigh*
damn.

to Greg... because i know eventually he'll read this

2006-01-27T21:33:03Z

Greg,

i'm sorry for everything that has happened in the past year. i really just miss talking to you and hanging out with you. i'm sorry for the last day we spoke when i cried and flipped out at you. i'm sorry that you'll mainly remember me that way, and not how i was happy with you at one point in time.

i just want to talk to you. you're my best friend and i miss you. and as a friend... i love you.

michael

2005-12-02T03:15:32Z

so i have a new bf and have for a couple weeks.
this is my rant that i wrote in english today:

so i wish i could begin to explain how i feel about him but he wouldnt understand. he is my every thought throughout the day. he always sees me smile and laugh, and granted im like that most of the time, its even more extreme when im with him. i know he says he never knows what to do when we hang out but i dont care. one of my favorite things to do with him is just to lay down and know he's next to me.

sometimes i feel like he doesn't love me, however; that he only says it just to say it. because i look back, and theres no real evidence that he does. he's never really showed it i guess if thats how i can put it? and it worries me sometimes. but then i continue to think that, i've never really showed it either. it's not that i dont love him its just like, idk how to express it with him i guess. like, most of my boyfriends all said corny stuff to me and id say it back. and i guess that was like a method of expression. thats basically how id like, pour my heart out. but mike shows little or no emotion like, 99% of the time and its hard to tell. like, i want to just fall on my knees, take his face and scream "show SOMETHING... ANYTHING! just show me you care! i love you! i love you more than anything! i want to be with you forever, i need you!" but i dont. i never do. i never say anything. i sit there day after day and remain quiet, thinking one day, just once, he'll say something. but thus far, it hasnt, and i continue to silence myself.

he told me what he was going to do for our one month // my birthday. and im not gunna lie, i would have loves it probably. but i'd rather him SAY something. i want him to tell me like, how much i mean to him i guess. not online. not in a text message. i want him to kiss me and tell me. just once.

so that was my rant.

in other news, last week him and chantal got in a car accident. i cried and met them at the hospital.

tired. write more later.

lately

2005-10-11T21:19:38Z

well i've been seeing a lot of Mattie lately. and we hung out with Chantal this past week which is awesome cuz i've missed her so much! its awesome seeing her more now i love that girl haha. idk its weird because every couple days Mattie will be like, so when are we gunna go out? and idk when we are. or if we are really. apparently i have to meet his mom first haha. i've met his sister and she likes me, and im def taking her to the mall with me soon haha. it'll be awesome. and a part of me really does want to go out with him, then there's a part thats like 'NO STOP THIS WILL BE A REPEAT OF EVERY OTHER RELATIONSHIP YOU'VE HAD!' and idk. maybe thats right. he just has a lot of emotional things going on. like hes depressed all the time. and, had i known him a year and a half ago, he would have been exactly what i wanted, because that's when i had the energy and patience for shit like that. i'd be so into it and be determined to change him so hes not depressed all the time and make him happy, but im just not like that anymore. i just dont have the patience. i dont want all this crap drama with relationships. i have enough drama with family and i dont need it with a boyfriend. boyfriends are where i go to escape shit like that. Mattie also like, won't open up to me whatsoever. anytime he's upset or depressed he just won't tell me why. he'll shut me out. which, frankly, is too much like what i do. and i can't deal with someone like me haha. its too much. so idk. maybe in time i'll end up dating him. who knows.

in other news, i have a future husband. kidding. no, i talked to Devin a lot of yesterday. what a cool kid. i miss him. i wish we were better friends when i lived there. sometimes i wonder what life would have been like for me if i never moved back to Avon and i had just stayed in Bedford. i'd probably still be on speaking terms with Darrin. and because 7th grade crushes own, i could have gone out with Devin hahahahahaha. but that's okay, because we decided we're getting married, even though he's gunna go to college in FL. haha. i probably would have never smoked or drank had i still lived up there. idk. life would have been so much different. then i wouldn't have dated all these shit guys in Avon. no offense if you're one of them (i.e. Greg cuz i know eventually you'll read this haha!). but idk. would have been cool to live there. i told Devin when i move into the new house (which is very unlikely because everyones against us) then he needs to come and visit. when i go to visit PSU i'll def tell him and have him come with haha.

i basically live on myspace, so if you have one, send me the link and i'll add you ;) haha.

tomorrow i get out of school early so i think i'm gunna go down to Waterford // Colchester to visit Mattie and Chantal. party party. i dont have work til 1 on thursday so i might stay down there.

yeah, getting pretty bored now. feel free to comment ♥

lately

2005-10-02T14:59:37Z

well 2 days ago (friday) i left at 730 to drive to waterford to visit Mattie at work and see my fam in moodus. i ended up getting lost so i called Greg and we were on the phone for over an hour trying to give me directions. by the time i called him i was already in storrs. so around 1015 i get to best buy and see Mattie. we hang out and visit Chantal. i called by dad but he never answered so i didn't see them. i left at 1 and got home at 2. i almost didnt make it out of colchester cuz my gas light was on and i could only pay in cash, which most gas stations dont do after like, 11. so i had to drive and find one Matt told me about. sooooo tiring.

then yesterday i filled up my gas tank and went down to waterford again. but this time i didn't tell Mattie. we text message a lot so i'm like 'guess what' and he replies 'what'. i said 'im in best buy' (where he works) and hes like 'oh which one' im like 'urs dumbass! tell me where you are' i was hiding so he wouldnt see where i was until he knew i was in his best buy so i was waiting for a reply. but he walked toward the front door and found me in one of the aisles and seemed really happy to see me. so i went to the section he works at and apparently some ppl he works with didnt believe i existed so he showed them haha. quite amusing. i got to best buy at 5 and he didnt get out til 7-730 so i went to the Crystal Mall right down the road for a few hours. saw some cute things but didnt end up getting anything. at 7 i left the mall and went back to the waterford commons where Matt works. i went to subway and got a sub which i didnt even finish and just drove around waiting for him to get out of work. we ended up going into Dick's for a while. then we went to his house so he could change, then to the beach. we hung out there for a while. it was gorgeous cuz by this time all the stars were out. then we went to stop and shop and back to the beach. some of his friends were there trying to open this car. one guy ended up breaking one of the side windows. soooo hilarious. then we went to go visit Chantal =). haha i miss her. we were there for a while and Chantal called Greg. we were late picking up Mattie's sister so we went to go get her and drove her home. she's sooooo nice haha. she's like 'i hope you stick around! really! and i never say that!' haha she was funny. so after we dropped her off we went back to the beach and layed on this blanket and looked at the stars it was so gorgeous out it was cute haha. then at around 1145 i left and got home around 1230. Matt had left me this message on my myspace so i read that and it was sooo sweet haha. so we talked until about 1 cuz we were both really tired. and yeah.

so yup that was basically my past couple days haha.
nothing else to really write about.

past couple days

2005-09-28T20:43:33Z

idk things with Greg are rocky. i mean i care about him a lot like as a friend but if im ever with someone he doesn't like hes a completely different person and gets mad at me.

which brings me to yesterday.

Chantal's friend Mattie came up to visit me yesterday. he got lost somewhere so i had to go find him in Hartford. made the trip twice as long as it should have haha. so i drove there, met him at a CVS, and had him follow me back to avon. we were on the highway and he drove next to me and honked so i looked over and he was lifting up his shirt so i just started cracking up. we finally got back to avon and hung out for like an hour and then Sara came over. we all talked and went online and agreed to go get pizza. we drove to the bank so i could get money, and realizing i had 11 bucks in my account, had my mom transfer more money. so we went and ordered our pizza and i went back to my bank again to see if the money was added. Mattie decided it would be fun if he could jump up and hit the bank sign. and he did. you saw him jump and then heard a boom and then "AH" haha. he cut his elbow on the sign. sososo gross. all bloody. so we walk into starbucks and i ordered something while mattie was in the bathroom washing his elbow. so disgusting haha. i hated seeing it so after starbucks we went to walgreens and i bought him band aids haha. we met Kate at walgreens and saw her for basically 15 minutes haha. we picked up our pizza then Mattie Sara and I headed back to my house, where we each ate only one piece lol. so we hung out, eventually put eyeliner on Mattie cuz he wanted to, and then drove Sara home. my gas light went on so we drove to mobil and i put some in and then we came back to my house. then Mattie and I hung out for basically an hour-hour and a half and then he drove home. it was really a lot of fun i was happy he came up here!

and while i was writing that he called me hahahahaha.

today was pretty boring. got out of school at 12. came home. took a nap haha. and im really hungry so im probably gunna go heat up some of that left over pizza haha. byeee.

ah more this weekend

2005-09-24T20:32:47Z

so last night i didn't really do anything. i went to bed early cuz i was tired as hell.
today i was supposed to hang out with Icky (Dave) but he had to teach until 330 and i had work at 530 so yeah. now i'm working 530-close and tomorrow after i go to UofH i'm going to see Just Like Heaven with Icky so it'll be a lot of fun. i'm really excited. i miss seeing this kid every morning haha. well im gunna eat and get ready for work... so... that was my update!

♥

busy busy weekend

2005-09-22T22:43:31Z

i was supposed to go to a concert tomorrow night but it effing sold out! argh.

friday: TOGA DAY! hot new toga haha. then toga dance tomorrow night! amazing.
saturday: during the day im hanging out with DAVID ICKY!!!! sooo excited <3 miss him soso much haha! should be lots of fun. then saturday night i work 5-close. gross.
sunday: 9-3 i'm going to University of Hartford for a tour of campus and talking to some of the people in the music department, should be fun. found out if i go there i get 20% off tuition bcuz Chuck is an alumni. i wont get in but if i did haha.

im looking at WCU at the end of october. gosh i hate college.

college

2005-09-17T15:45:58Z

so the past 3 days ive done a lot of shit for colleges.
then i read my transcript and realized i'm going to tunxis.

number of each grade:
A: 6 (i'd like to say 5 of those are choir, 1 is phase 5 english)
B+: 3 (all electives. none are academic. choir // theory // intro to drama)
B: 2
B-: 3
C+: 3
C: 7
C-: 7
D: 4
F: 2
yeah... i'm going extremely far in life.

Colleges I'm Applying To:

Safety Schools-
*Plymouth State University (NH)
*Central Connecticut State University (CT obviously)

Regular Schools I Wouldn't Mind Going To-
*University Of Hartford (CT again, obvi)
*West Chester University Of Pennsylvania (PA durr)

Schools I Won't Get Into But My Parents Are Making Me Apply Anyway-
*Ithaca College (NY)
*Berklee College Of Music (Boston, MA)
*University Of Connecticut (CT, again, obviously)

7 schools. i'll get into MAYBE 3. if i'm lucky. if i'm really lucky and pray and sacrifice my first born child.

i'm so fucked.

life

2005-09-09T20:25:35Z

well seeing as i only write in here when i'm upset, now would be an ideal time.

Jons leaving tomorrow.
i'm balling my eyes out.
i look like a raccoon.
this completely and utterly sucks.

in other things, i talked to Greg. shocking, i know. we talked basically from 10-2 last night, and then 2 out of 3 lunches today. just about random stuff. it's good not having to pretend i dont see him now haha. i only have to do that when hes with his friends basically.

saw Jon after school. thought i was going to see him for more than an hour, but, apparently not. i have to finish his present. im dropping it off tomorrow before he leaves =(. im going to cry harder tomorrow than i am right now. that will basically take up my entire weekend. i really dont want to work tomorrow i'll just be miserable.

maybe write later.

my love

2005-08-30T05:19:42Z

so it's really late. or early. however you want to put it. again, i'm not going to write about what's happened lately, more like what's going to happen.

Jon's going to school. in 11 days. i guess cuz that's what was in his away message. because he wants to go. and i wouldnt blame him. id wanna go to. but i feel like hes over excited to go. like he doesn't care that hes leaving his family... or me... at all. and it KILLS me. honestly it does. i can't think about it without crying. and it makes me happy he wants to go. it really does. im glad he likes school and will enjoy his time up there. but i wish he showed the slightest emotion that he'll miss anything about avon, even if its not me. i've spent literally my entire summer with him. every day. and hes going to leave. and i knew it would happen and i was totally prepared. i never prepared for actually caring about him tho. that was NOT part of my plan. he was such a sweet guy when we started dating. you can see it in earlier entries. now hes just ready to go. he got what he wanted and this whole summer will mean absolutely nothing. it breaks my heart. it shatters it. he knows i'm the kind of person who would drive the hour drive every day if it meant i got to see him for 5 minutes. of course i would. or if he wanted to see me for the day on sunday i'd go. if he was upset about something, i'd be the first person to go see him and make sure he was alright. that's the kind of person/girl/girlfriend i am. but it's like, now that he's going back, hes anxious to go, and all he cares about is Berkshire and his djing. and i hate it. i absolutely 100% hate it. and it's driving me crazy. he most likely doesnt love me and i know that. i know hes going to leave, break up with me in a matter of days, and i'm going to be alone. he most likely doesn't want a commitment. and it really hurts. it feels like im being stabbed in the heart repeatedly. it kills me.

i cant rant anymore for fear of crying. feel free to comment.

mehhh

2005-08-15T15:47:40Z

well im watching tv right now. i dont write often so again, i'll write what i remember.

*Jon takes tennis lessons now from 9-12, then 1-3. its craziness.
*i have a job now at Cosi, so that'll be taking up time. i've already worked 2 days, but it's actually a lot of fun. the people are really cool.
*i'm realizing how close to the end of summer it is, which is making me really depressed. not because of going back to school, because i'm actually really excited for that, but the fact that JON has to go back and i won't see him is really hitting hard.

that's really the main thing on my mind, Jon going back to school. like, i don't know what to do with myself when i don't see him for ONE day, so i'm worrying about going a week without seeing him. but it won't be as bad as i thing it will, because i mean, not seeing him a day in the summer sucks cuz i have nothing else to do. when i have to go a week, i have school, work, applying for college... it won't nearly be as bad, because i'll have things to do. plus he knows if he ever wanted me to go up and see him, i'd do it. i'm not even that worried that he'll find someone up there. if he did, i probably wouldn't be shocked. it's just something i've come to expect, and not worry until that time comes. just like, this summer has been the most AMAZING summer i've ever had. like, as much as i try to hide how i feel (which is a really bad habit) like i can be myself around Jon and be totally retarded and i LOVE it. i couldn't do that before and i had to basically supress my stupid urges, which is probably why i'm used to hiding my feelings; because i couldn't show them before. i'm getting kind of better at it.

okay moving away from that stuff....

i still haven't moved and it sucked. we're supposedly moving soon. we're always moving soon. its pissing me off. ahhhhhh.

well now i'm really bored and have nothing really to talk about... so.... i'll write more in a couple days.

hyperangel1214 @ 2005-08-06T12:22:00

2005-08-06T16:30:10Z

havent written in a while, and too much crap happens, so i'll write about what i can remember haha.

well, jon's grounded, and i hate being home with the fam, so i've been going out. 2 nights ago i went to Max's with some people. this kid Eric came up to avon for the first time in 7 years. he was really good friends with Mike. i had talked to Eric online so we've been hanging out since hes been up here. i havent hung out with that group in a while. i met this guy ryan who went to farmington high who knows people i know. so i hung out with him for a while. hes obsessed with fighting video games like mortal combat. its hilarious. so i was there for a while and just got bored so i left. then yesterday i went back there and saw pretty much the same people again. i saw jon tho! even tho hes grounded haha. his mom went out to lunch so i went over for a bit. then i went to drop off south park. then i was at starbucks, felt bad, so i got him gum and a cookie. haha. so i saw him 3 times. i hate that hes grounded since i know it's less than a month before i go back to school. mehhhhhhhh.

well, i got bored of writing this. maybe ill write more later.

things

2005-07-15T02:28:16Z

so i guess things are pretty good

the friend front:
spending a lot of time with Sara because she is amazing and makes my life complete haha. i'm also talking to a lot more people from the play like Cathy, Brooke, and David Icky and Kemp. so it's a lot of fun. i talked to Mike from farmington today. first time since the week after prom. i might hang out with him tomorrow since we haven't seen each other in a while.
the family front:
things are alright i guess. we're moving saturday morning and seeing our house tomorrow.
the boyfriend front:
we're had really dumb little fights but i love him nonetheless. i had a really big emotional thing today that i hope will pass. we spend part of every day together and i love it. we've started playing tennis everday, which, if i keep doing along with what i'm eating, will help me lose weight which isnt much needed but i'd like to be HEALTHY at least. we're not going to NYC anymore but sunday we're going to the beach in RI. and when i go to look at colleges in the cities i'm taking him with me. so things are pretty good with him.

so i have all this amazing stuff going on but i feel really weird. maybe it's just today. i've been really weird today. i feel empty. i know this feeling will pass by the morning. but idk. i feel hollow and like i should be doing something really important and i'm not. idk.

i heart outlets

2005-07-04T02:45:50Z

1 tee + 1 tank from delias, 2 tees from fossil, 1 vintage polo + 1 jean skirt + 1 pair of capris + 1 pair of twill pants from aeropostale, 1 long sleeve tee + 1 pair of green pants from quicksilver = UNDER $100!!!!!

how effing sweet is that?
i love outlet malls.

moving

2005-07-03T15:21:50Z

so apparently someone is really interested in buying our house, so we're packing and stuff to move out as soon as we can. we are either staying in NYC at Sandy's penthouse for 3 weeks, staying at George David's house on Deercliff which is the same road we're planning to move on, or they all go to NYC and i stay with my grandparents or a friend or JON and just like rotate houses haha. i might have to do that so i can stay in the play and stuff so yeah. we all really would rather stay at George's. but i have to pack and go through all my clothes and see which ones i want to keep or not. and THEN i have to go through them and decide which ones i think i'll wear for the next month and put the rest away. we have to keep everything we want for the next month in our cars, and im feelin really good since i have a big SUV. haha. idk we'll see what happens.

Jon's in boston right now, which is kind of sad. cept i talked to him like, 4 times yesterday, text messages, and then talked to him for over an hour and a half last night haha. he called me yesterday morning when he was in the car and then after we hung up called back literally like 3 minutes later and was like i love you and i miss you. it was cute haha. then i was talking to him on the phone and Bjorn online so they were having this metrosexual conversation through me about some jeans Bjorn wants that Jon saw and it was awkward haha. anyhoo... Jon comes back tomorrow night so YAY.

i'm so completely bored. Chuck and mom have yet to get their paychecks so it'll be another week before we have those. i have more money in my bank account than my mom does... which actually amuses me haha.

i think today i need to go shopping and get more summer clothes since what i have is limited. even tho i was JUST talking about getting RID of clothes haha. we'll see. i might not go tho, because Sara has a show today, Jaclyn's in New Jersey, and Jon is in Boston, so that limits who i'd go with haha.

anyways... bored... write more later maybe.

hyperangel1214 @ 2005-06-30T22:06:00

2005-07-01T02:11:12Z

so the play is starting to get really intense with rehearsals. ahh. i have to teach Sara the 7 dances we've done this week thus far, and we still have tomorrow... i'm going to die.

so heads up i wont update for a while!
-my cousins are here for the summer and im gunna spend time with them
-summer show and then performances july 28-30 (which Jon is going to!)
-tomorrow me jon and the fam are going out for dinner to see my cousins
-tomorrow i'm probably going to the mall... hopefully with Jaclyn
-saturday i need to teach Sara the dances and Jon's going to boston to see a sox game... effing jealous
-madrigal script writing every week
-july 15-17 Jon's taking me to new york city and we might see WICKED which would make my entire life! ahhh! haha. it would be me, jon, and his fam. that would be soooo much fun! we're already planning out where we're going in terms of like shopping & stuff haha! amazing!
-might have to start summer school. ugh!

i'll update just not often!

Jon

2005-06-29T04:23:49Z

so sunday i went to sycamore with this guy Jon and my friend Hillary. Jon and I got along right away and it was awesome. me him and Hillary had such a fun time. Hillary knew his brother from camp i guess too. so Jon had to leave and i was like woa Jon is so cool haha. so i talked to Jon later that night and we drove around and hung out. he is by far the sweetest person i've ever met. and i've met some sweet people. idk. i was totally just like swept off my feet. that's never happened. idk it was so out of the ordinary. totally romantic and sweet and just everything at once. so i brought him home and came home, and we talked online. he ended up asking me out. and idk, it was like so odd. it was just something you can't let get away, yknow? so i said yes. so then monday was the accident. he was in the car. im so happy it was on my side of the car and not his. that would have been so depressing. i was so sure he was never going to speak to me again. but of course, we talked past 12.

so getting to today...

he came over. we made cake, watched the notebook since he had never seen it before while i played with the baby. i was like crying in the movie. he didn't cry tho, it was sad haha. so after that i tried to get him to sing for me and he was playing around with my guitar. then we went and layed on the trampoline and talked. it was cool. we came inside around 1015 and i was playing with my camera and took like 10 pictures of him cuz his myspace pic SUCKS haha. then his brother came and got him at like, 1030. my parents LOVE him. especially Chuck. Aliza was like Tia i have to talk to you (during the movie) i was like uhm ok? shes like 'are you going out with him?' and i didnt want to say yes i was like uhm no why? shes like 'why not?! hes cute, ask him out right now!' haha it was funny. it was a good night.

some amazing things jon has said to me in the past few days:
*omg no you have no idea lol your the culmination of everything i look for in a girl
*me: thats cuz we're like the gender opposites of each other haha
jon: i so told you we're made for each other
*your all i can think about now.
*your just so... like... everything funny, smart, musical easy to talk to
*i feel like such a retard.. but like that was out of the ordenary.. like you just feel right, in my arms.. and your smile is to die for
*Auto response from jon: food.

i kissed a angel.
*omg im like i just sat next to the person ive been dreaming about, hoping for, and wanting for so long
*like just talking with you.. was amazing
*i love this im beaming.
*tia, this.. this is great like unreal
*theres the communication that we get, that no one else does, that doesnt work in words
*jon: omg was tonight our first date?
me: basically?
jon: k good cuz it was perfect
*jon (taking my quiz from my myspace): "Your Summer Love Style is Head Over Heels

This summer you're ready for a total head spin crush. You've done the summer fling thing before, and now you want something real. You're looking to fall head over heels in love this summer... Even if you don't know who you'll fall for yet."
jon: ironic
me: haha isnt it tho?
jon: yeah
jon: i was reading that this afternoon, and i was like whoaa
jon: i hope to death that becomes me
*you have.. just.. like filled this gap in my life.. like the need for someone to hug, to kiss, to sing to, just.. wow
*omg your like.. so.. unreal like i cant believe this happened
*tia i think were gonna fall in love. your unlike... anyone else i just get that feeling like you know.. you just make me feel so.. everything and i cant stop thinking about you
*im crazy about you, tia.

and all of that was in ONE day. ahhh.

okay im done now! =)

car accident

2005-06-27T21:45:21Z

yeah so about an hour and a half ago i got in a car accident by country club/old wheeler by rbs. with jonny in my car. the other car left. my car door is a huge dent. i cried. the cop pitied me. i got no ticket, no report filed since the other car left, no nothing. i feel really lucky. i feel bad for jon tho. chuck was really cool about it. my parents are just like yeah, dont do it again, and no more extended curfew. done.

hyperangel1214 @ 2005-06-19T11:27:00

2005-06-19T15:35:19Z

so i'm an aunt now. and have been for 2ish weeks. i LOVE her shes so adorable. her name is Nevaeh Marie (heaven backwards). shes so adorable. i spend a lot of time with her, basically at least 2 hours every day unless i have work. i only work 2 more times. then im done. thank god. well hey, go me for keeping a job for 6 months. i def miss everyone. Kevin left, Adam's leaving, Jamie and Maggie might leave, Peej and Kim who are the best people ever might leave, Lauren's leaving. so anyone i even half liked is leaving. i love Peej and Kim tho, we're gunna hang out even after i leave and they (might) leave.

so my dad decided to move without telling me. i called seeing if i was still going over and hes like 'well, the only things left are stuff in my closet, pictures, the dining room table and chairs, and a tv on the floor.' cuz apparently now he moved to bitch-Cathy's house in the middle of fucking nowhere, namely moodus, connecticut. 1 stop light in the entire town. and all it does is blink yellow. all day. every day. moodus is like 30 something miles from my dads house, so what maked him think im driving 40 miles there and back every other weekend? hahahahaha.... no.

2 more days of exams. and then IM A SENIOR!!!! shweet. feels awesome. kinda needa pass english first tho. i need a 77 on my exam to get a 65 for the SEMESTER. im so awesome. and im not taking summer school. fuck that. ill take english 2nd sem with the juniors rather than waste my summer.

speaking of wasting my summer, there will be no family vaca. meaning no cape cod. for the first time in my entire life we're NOT going to cape cod for a week or even a weekend. so ill go with my mom or friends or something. me and Jaclyn are planning to take a road trip down to FL and stay at my house there for a week or 2. im also doing the summer play i think. depending on whether im a hot box dancer or not. we'll see. the play rehearsals start the 22nd so we'll see whats up with that.

well now im off to get directions to whatever restaurant im meeting my dad at.

feel free to comment more on this one since i know Dee, Matas, and Greg have been having fun in the other one.

hyperangel1214 @ 2005-06-11T10:12:00

2005-06-11T14:12:21Z

guys are confusing. the end.

hyperangel1214 @ 2005-06-05T00:56:00

2005-06-05T04:58:27Z

i cant even express the hatred i have for my mother right now. i was supposed to stay at Kevins with Mike and his friends and their girlfriends. and my mom decides to not let me go. so after screaming at each other for 20 minutes, chuck talks to Mike, who then comes in and sees us screaming, which was an awesome sight, so i just told him to go to Kevins alone since when i TRIED to leave my mom SHOVED me. stupid whore. so im home from prom at FUCKING 12 which NO ONE does. im crying. im so upset. i want to fucking kill her, stupid bitch!

git-r-dun...... posuir

2005-05-23T00:41:40Z

so i got my license friday.

and now it's sunday. and i did a 360 on lovely street. totally unintentionally. because it was raining. and it scared the SHIT out of me.

i bought seat covers for my car. i put all my cds and cd visor in, and my air freshener. it's been tia-fied.

my mom's wedding is next saturday. that'll be fun.

saw Mike friday night at Ben and Jerrys when i went to visit. he was being an ass because he was with his friends. go figure. macho football/lacrosse player being an ass? hah.

i had my first actual serious conversation with Kevin M. (the one i work with) earlier this week and it was actually really nice. i totally trust him. i'm gunna be so upset when he leaves =(